Bozo criminal for today violated Bozo Rule number 8787 which clearly states that you should always obtain a getaway vehicle that will go faster than five miles per hour. From Gastonia, North Carolina, comes the story of bozo John Wilbanks who drove up to a gas station, filled up, and left without paying. The attendant was on the lookout for gas thieves and called the cops who arrived and busted our bozo before he got more than 100 yards down the road. Did we mention our bozo was driving a stolen vehicle? A riding lawn mower. He’s been charged with theft.