Thanks to Bozo News Hawk Laura Davidson for sending in today’s report. From Monroe, Washington, comes the story of bozos Allen Payne and Kyle Baxter who broke into a department store and stole a bunch of pillows and several backpacks. And like many of us, our bozos couldn’t wait until they got home to try out the merchandise. Police followed a trail of cardboard and pillows to a secluded area near the store, where they found our bozos sound asleep on their stolen pillows. They’ve been awakened and arrested.