Bozo criminal for today comes from the International File in Pretoria, South Africa, where bozo John Rafferty walked into the police station and filed a complaint that a gang that had accosted him at gunpoint had stolen his cell phone. The detective took down all the pertinent information and, when our bozo had finished giving his statement, he decided to dial the phone number. The phone began ringing inside our bozo’s pocket. Oops. He’s been charged with making a false statement.