Thanks to Bozo News Hawk Alex Hart for sending in today’s report. From Fairfield, Iowa comes the story of a couple of bozos who stole the safe from the local Elks lodge. And since they were only thieves, and not safecrackers, they took the safe to a secluded place and called in an expert to open it up, right? Wrong. They drove into an open field, near a preschool, in the middle of the night and went to work on it. One of them held the flashlight while the other pounded on the safe with a hammer and a pry bar. As you might expect, police were called when neighbors complained about the pounding sound. They’re under arrest.