Thanks to Bozo News Hawk Glen Snow for sending in today’s report from Modesto, California. Police and the fire department were called to the local Walgreens after a report of a fire in the bathroom. It was our bozo’s explanation that landed him in our story. He told the cops that he “had a accident” and was trying to remove his underpants, but couldn’t. So he did what any bozo would do. He took out his lighter and lit his underwear on fire. The drawers went up in flames quickly and our bozo panicked, tossing them into the toilet. The flames were quickly extinguished but smoke filled the store, causing it to be evacuated. This could all have been just a very embarrassing incident except for the fact that our bozo had two outstanding felony warrants. He’s under arrest.