Thanks to Bozo News Hawk Glen Snow for sending in today’s report from Wilkes-Barre, Pennsylvania, where bozo Maurice Ford came up with the crappiest excuse ever to try to keep from getting arrested. Local police noticed our bozo walking erratically and jumping off the sidewalk and into traffic. He claimed that the reason for his unsteady gait was that he was trying to avoid stepping into dog poop on the sidewalk. Thinking he was under the influence of drugs or alcohol, the officers attempted to arrest the man, who then came up with the most bozo way ever to try to avoid arrest. He dropped to the ground and rolled in the dog poop and then informed the officers that they couldn’t arrest him because he was covered in feces. Didn’t work. The cops held their noses and took him in.