Bozo criminal for today comes from Clinton Township, Michigan, where our unidentified bozo walked into a bank, set a cloth bag on the counter, stated that the bag contained a bomb and demanded cash from the teller. Thinking the bag looked like it could contain explosives, and, not wanting to take any chances, the teller gave our bozo an undisclosed amount of money. The bozo, described as being a heavy set woman of about 60 years of age, then fled, leaving the bag behind. The building was evacuated and a bomb squad was called in. After X-Raying the bag, it was discovered to contain…two cans of spaghetti sauce. Police are still looking for the suspect.