Thanks to Bozo News Hawk Glen Snow for sending in today’s report from Portland, Maine, where bozo Remus Oates was involved in an accident in which he crashed his car into a fire hydrant. When the officer arrived, he asked our bozo to step out of the car to take a field sobriety test. Our bozo obviously misunderstood the request. Thinking the officer had asked for a urine test, he unzipped his pants and peed on the front tire of the officer’s cruiser. Bad idea. He’s been charged with driving drunk and indecent conduct.