Thanks to Bozo News Hawk Glen Snow for sending in today’s report. From Spokane Valley, Washington, comes the story of bozo Mike Haines who tried to break into a liquor store using a rock. When he couldn’t shatter the glass, he went to a nearby hardware store and purchased a hammer for $10.99. He then went back to the liquor store, broke the window with the hammer and stole an $8.99 bottle of wine. He’d already lost money on the deal before he was nabbed by the cops and charged with burglary.