Thanks to Bozo News Hawk Glen Snow for sending in today’s report. From Lakeland, Florida comes the story of bozo Darren Carpenter who was seen by the police wheeling a large trash can down the sidewalk at four o’clock in the morning. An officer stopped to investigate and found the trash can was full of beer, several cases of the stuff. When asked where the beer came from, our bozo replied that he found it next to a dumpster at a nearby restaurant. Well, not exactly. Investigating officers found a large hole in the building’s wall, leading to a storage room where the beer was kept. Our bozo has been charged with burglary.